How to be Happy?
Ah, that question. If only I could tell you the answer!
It is interesting that in English we say happy whereas Latin languages say ‘content’ or ‘contento’. If we were to use the word Content in English, it has a very different feel to happy doesn’t it?
So are we baying for the moon?
I guess the answer is that it depends what your expectation is. If your goal is to be happy all of the time, then probably yes. All human emotions are, well, human and so in order to feel one, we have to know that the opposite is. To feel happy, we know what it is to feel sad etc. If the goal is to increase our happiness quotient, now that’s a realistic goal. The great thing is, we may already have more happiness than we previously thought. Here’s the magic.
When you think about happiness, you must be comparing yourself to something, someone, some other time in life. How do you know? Well, when you started reading this, what thoughts, images, names came into your head. Your unconscious may well have momentarily flashed a ‘happy’ image to you which would have given you a clue. If you can identify that, pull it to your conscious and examine what the perceived elements of that happiness are. Next you can ask yourself if that is a fair comparison – what are the circumstances now compared to then, you compared to them.
Now, complete this sentence: I will be happier when……….
Once you have answered, ask ‘is this true?’
If you said ‘yes’, I would ask how you know if it is not present now and if it was in the past you cannot know it would still make you happy and if it is someone else, you cannot know they are happy in the first place.
Right, now we know that contentment is happiness, that there is something/one we are comparing ourselves too.
Next, let’s look at what does make us content in our lives at the moment. Got something? Great, what else? Keep going until you are all out of items. Now, starting small, what is something that you could do/have/be which may help you feel more content?
Finally, go and do it, experiment, action leads to change and that change may just result in the extra contentment we would all like.
( oh yes, as a real give away, cheat…….if you want to feel happy, act happy. Your body will soon trick your mind and before you know it your emotional state will follow. SMILE)
Spot your thinking patterns and look into them, stop them and choose to smile.